There's still a feeling of restlessness in the air, like we can hear the music, even feel the bass booming, but there's no party to be seen. Everyone feels it. The extreme fatigue has lifted (thank goodness), sleep is better, moods are overall higher, and yet... I centered myself, took a deep breath, and asked for some illumination, and what I got was that we're like the outer crust on the Earth, our physical lives make up that percentage of what makes us US. I think it's a REALLY small percentage - like .01% of the whole Earth's matter (if anyone knows for sure, please let me know). So we experience things only when they're on that surface, and that's how we've been living our lives (and previous lives) for millions of years. Rely on what's in front of you, what you can experience with your physical 5 senses, only now it's all changed. If you stop for a moment, maybe you can feel it bubbling up from your core, from the center of the "Earth." The changes start at the center, then expand and expand until finally (FINALLY) they reach the outer crust, but that's not until the very last minute, kind of like the designing shows (not that I watch THAT many, mind you) where they work for 1000 people hours to re-do the house, and it looks like chaos until the last 15 minutes when they race around hanging pictures, lighting candles, draping afghans, and rolling out the rugs.
So, that's apparently where we are with all of our momentous changes - they're just starting to "hang the pictures and light the candles" in our physical lives - we're just beginning to see and feel consciously how it's all coming together, but still feeling that "we want to be DONE with all of this" kind of feeling (I know I am). The answer? One thing I saw was to concentrate on exactly what's in front of you every moment - dive into the moment, gobble it up, be there fully, enjoy it. If we don't know yet what's going on, then nothing we think about or plan for is going to make any difference (or sense). We're free to do whatever we want to do, but if you're feeling frustrated, maybe it's time to try something different. The phrase "the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expect different results" keeps popping up in my head, so I think that's also the order of the day. If you usuallly run for your pot of coffee first thing in the morning to get you going, maybe you could try a brisk walk and a glass of purified water. If you worry about every little thing in the future, maybe you can be preemptive and say to yourself one day "for this WHOLE day, I choose not to worry about anything. I'll act as if everything is in perfect order" and see what happens.
This is a shifting time, an integrating time, a coming-together time, and I have no idea what's on the other side after this step, but I trust that it's absolutely glorious and wonderful, because I already feel that most of the time right now. It's just this restless feeling that's getting annoying. What's next? What's next? What am I going to be when I grow up? I have no idea, but it's making for an exciting story, and I can't wait to see how it's going to unfold.
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