Shifting shifting

I felt it Saturday morning, on the elliptical machine in the basement at the Grand Hotel in Minneapolis. For no reason, my heart rate shot up to 160, and I hadn't even started "ellipting" yet. So I jumped off, went up to my room and did yoga for 1/2 hour. I took some deep breaths and did the energy clearing that Mags gave to me. I thought it was just the excitement of being with my sisters, but yesterday morning I woke up with that shivery feeling in the middle of my chest, the beginning of a panic attack, yet there is nothing in my world that would cause it, so I relaxed and asked what was up. The answer I got back is that we're on the edge (today is the breaking through) of an enormous energy shift that is feeling like the end of things for a lot of people, and because I am so connected to humanity, I'm picking up on those fears. If it feels like the old "too sensitive" thing, it's not, it's really not - it's more about this new place where we are either headed, or already find ourselves, and this new place is unity - it's where we're all connected. There's no more separation, and you have to be diligent to know where your soul boundaries are - where do you end and everyone else begin? It's an age old question, to be sure, but one that shines a little brighter in my world these days.

I continue with my walks, and found myself pacing a 4mph walk listening to Buddha Bar 7 - honestly, it sets a perfect pace, but doesn't make you walk TOO fast, just nice and fast enough. I walked up to 13th Ave. today, then around, and still made it in 45 minutes. My insides feel wide open right now, and I think this is a really good place we have traveled to, even though my road was really rocky and felt precarious at times. I realize I MUST be protected at all times; otherwise, it's just too hard - we'd all crash. But if we don't "crash," if we keep going, day after day, there's just GOT to be something out there that is watching over us, doesn't there? Otherwise it's just a big soup of humanity crawling around, and that's just too awful to consider. No, my vision is of all of us as small children at the mall, running freely to the toy store, knowing intuitively that Mom and Dad are behind you somewhere, keeping an eye on you, keeping you safe, no matter what you do. If you get lost, you get scared, and may cry, because you aren't with Mom and Dad, you can't see them, you don't know if they're still taking care of you. Then you see them round the corner, and you are relieved, because you know they'll never leave you in that scary mall. You want to explore, want to run around and see stuff, but you know somehow that you're not able to navigate these bigger waters all by yourself. Alone in your backyard, probably - out in the big world? We need help.

So I feel the help, I love my help, my guides who are as near and dear to me as my own heartbeat. I love my Higher Self, whatever that means, knowing that it is now inside me here, there is no separation, and I like feeling my whole world inside of me - it feels cozy, like a party. So let the shifts keep coming, I'm learning how to ride the waves so that I don't get a mouth full of salt water. Dip dip, rise up high. On and on it goes, the miracle under our skin transforming us every moment of our lives, even if we can't see it, we can feel it, can't we? I take a moment to be in my skin, to feel what that means, and I like it, I like it a lot.