happy

My back has frozen up tighter than the ice storm scheduled for tonight... and I'm happy.
It was cloudy most of the day... and I'm happy.
I felt so tired that I took long nap... and I'm happy.
I finished the last of the editing on Dad's book ... and I'm happy.
Steve's in Lamoure speaking at their District Convention ... and I'm happy.
Eastgate Funeral Home called Mom - I need to sign some papers ... and I'm happy.
Kari needs to get her eyes checked ... and I'm happy.
Rusty won't stop howling most days and nights ... and I'm happy.
Bill starts basketball tonight ... and I'm happy.

I guess what I want to say is that it's an odd feeling - no matter what's going on in my "real" world, I'm happy, like it's all bubbling up to the surface and spills over. Okay, I got crabby last night because I can't even walk upright, and my back hurts like a son of a gun, but that's okay, because ... I'm happy. Kari and I talked for over an hour last night - she has come to the conclusion that she's has control issues, and realizes that you don't have much control over a lot of things. I'm 47, and I'm still figuring that one out. I think if you can get a handle on that, you'll be, yup, answer for me ... happy.

Because, after all, it really IS a swift ride this time around, and if you're not happy, then you're probably sad. Or mad. Or bad. Or something else that ends in "ad." Rad? No - that would be a GOOD thing to be. A cad? I'd rather be everything that ends in "appy" like nappy, sappy, (not crappy). Okay - get it now? It's all in how you look at things, how you decide to feel, maybe even beforehand, that counts. I remember living the first two Reiki principles for a whole week. They are "Just for today, do not worry. Just for today, do not anger." Okay, everyone - try those on for size. It was easy for me not to worry, but not to get angry? I realized I had some issues around that emotion. So, I'll try them both again for this next week - do not worry, do not anger. And hey, guess what? The sun's come out, if just for a moment, before it dips down and we watch the ice storm stream in. Those are so dangerous, even walking, when the ice sheets thick on your car windows and you can't even drive, and there are accidents everywhere. So I choose to stay in tonight, and read "To Kill a Mockingbird" (I know, shocking that an English major has never read it - but it was highly recommended by Mary Holtey, so I'll take her recommendation), and wait for sweet Steve to come back from his talk. I hope he misses the ice storm, but either way... I'll be happy (AND I won't worry or get angry). Just for today.